Scared of being Loney!!

OMGGGG... i have issues....

I am convinced that it is a personal problem that I cant find a solution to...

I hate loneliness..I mean who doesntr right?!! but mine is to an extreme. I cant settle with one guy because im scared of loneliness..
I could deal with me not being physically close to them for a little period of time but talking to them.. I WANNA talk to them all the time.. I need that attention

I am yearning for the emptiness to be filled up cos i feel im running out of time
I try to be patient and look for other ways to take up the time
I find multiple ways that seem to be working well
if one is unavailable I simply find comfort in another
It brightens my day to be able to be happy at all times
even if it takes two or three people to do it.

When all three dont give me the attention that i yearn for
what is a girl like me to do.
Im left alone with a broken nerve and a state of confusion
train of thoughts gushing down my head on what my next move should be
By this time Im left hurting deep inside.

NOW my head is spinning
I need comfort tonight. who can I talk to if all three dont pick up
I go through my contacts yearning for a word from old friends, ex's, old lovers,someone, anyone
cant find who to talk to
Im fighting, Im kicking, swinging...getting myself worked out
I feel like my time is running out
What is a girl to do.

Im scared of being lonely... I am

Happy June Bloggers!

Oh my gosh! Its been forever guys! But yea I'm back!!! So much has happened its kindof crazy! I dont even know where to start! But first of all Happy June guys!! Thank God we are all still alive to see another month! We shall have many more months to come. AMEN! Yay its June and May is over! I feel May was the roughest month i have ever had in my life, but Im thankful that its all over :-). So yea I told you about "eyecandy" my newest crush, yea I dont understand but I just feel like he is not feeling e the way I want him too. Im not sure maybe he doesnt know how to express his feelings or maybe he is just not that into me. He is really physical but he wont call me or text me... I dont understand which guy that likes a girl who wont want to talk to her every chance he gets? well all in all I havnt spoken to him in about two weeks...doesnt that suck? I feel sad but not hurt..I'll get over him right...he must have just not liked me that much.
Besides that, my ex left me!! like he moved to another continent *tears*....I had been dreading the day he would leave but I guess it had to happen!! I really miss him! he called me as soon as he could..gosh! he has a way of making me feel special when he wants but *sigh* he is in a better country now :-( . I wonder what would happen when we see each other again. I feel like he has me on a freakin leash!! urghh why? he is good for me but not good for me, but hmm we are real good buddies so I guess thats good enough!!

So how bout this is my first summer alone :-( i have no one but my blackberry!! doesnt that suck!!! But thank God I have various jobs to keep my mind off things. Gosh I was going crazy when i was unemployed! but yay!!!..so basically thats all that has been happening with me guys June should bring me so much heart warming :-)...ttyl